Hear Ye, Hear Ye... NEW BLOG RULE.

While we at FPGP Central Command do not believe in censorship, I think we need to cool it with the ButterTits comments here. Start with my "Welcome to the blog... Jason Gore" post and all the comments, and work you way back up to this one. Be sure to follow the URLs that are posted and look at the pictures. You will be convinced that our blog has been visited by The Gores, Jason and Megan. If you don't want to read all of it, I leave you with this picture of our commenter holding up the actual trophy JG won last year on Tour... I can't see this being faked, particularly as fast as she put it up after I suggested it. Click HERE for the photo.

Although we know this is all in fun, and the Gores are REMARKABLY cool about all of this poking fun, it doesn't seem right to be as nasty as we are if they are surfing the blog. Hell, Mrs. Gore may even join the damn pool next year, so let's be nice and take her money! :-)

I am all about making obnoxious commentaries and having fun... but let's keep the stuff to flesh wounds, not daggers to the heart. Honestly, it will be a lot more fun from me to have a PGA Tour Professional visit the blog from time to time, maybe drop a comment, give us some insight into life on the Tour, etc., than for us to just be stupid for our own amusement.

Sorry JG!

I'm conviced it is Jason and his wife that have blogged here. He seems to be the bigger "no offense" man here. For the trash talk we have put on him, he seems to be a cool guy, with an cool wife. I'm sure I've written a few things, and for that I appologize. I hope you can understand it was just fun amongst the guys in the FPGP and not really a personal thing.

Hittem' long and straight, except for the doglegs.

-Shades aka "Jumpin' Jeff"

Now Serving... Crow

Uh guys... I think it really may be Jason Gore and his wife that are commenting... check out the posts below... the last pic is pretty compelling... if they show us one with him in it, and it is doesn't look like a photoshop deal, well...

WE HAVE A PGA PLAYER READING OUR BLOG!!!

Of course, it is a PGA player who we have constantly made fun of, but so be it. It would be mucho cool if they actually joined the FPGP next year. It does bring up an ethical question though... we don't want to turn Jason into golf's version of Pete Rose.

It may also be someone with a great deal of time on their hands, but I am not getting that feeling here. Check out the post and comments below...

Welcome To Our Blog... Jason Gore

We seem to have lurkers who have turned into comment leavers who are representing themselves as... JASON GORE. Yes fellow FPGPers, the RoundOne is now reading our blog!!! We have achieved big-time. I told you there was a lot of upside to this blog idea. Anyway...

Welcome to the blog JG59... it is great to have you. I hope you understand that we poke fun, because we love. In fact, we have a great deal in common with you... for example:

1. No one in this pool is currently in the top 130 on the PGA Tour Money List.
2. No one in this pool works on the weekend.

See, that is two things we have in common... so let's all just get along. In fact, we would love for you to join our pool next year... if it is ethically possible of course. To be safe, make sure you don't "short" (rules are posted on the right) yourself, even though that might be the easiest pick to make.

Oh, and if you see that AssFuck Baddeley around, tell him to drop the bible, grab his clubs, and hit the damn driving range. I can break 80 from the back tees at that fucking course, so I expect a little more out of "Badds." Thanks.

Good Firewater In Connecticut

Don't look now, but Notah "DWI" Begay is near the top of the leaderboard.

And in the spirit of jinxing myself again,... D.J. Trahan is LEADING. I am sure he'll have a nice 75-83 finish on the weekend though, so you guys ahead of me have nothing to worry about.

Aaron Freaking Baddeley

Seriously, did he just decide to stop trying after his "breakthrough win" a couple months ago? Another fine round of 78 today... he couldn't even beat butter tits!

I think it is time for his hot ass wife to start "witholding" from him. No cut, no nookie! Something needs to be done to get this shit stain to concentrate. Seriously... this is simple operant conditioning... if he shoots 78 and still gets to bang her, who could blame the guy? However, if she has a "69 or better and you get 69 or better..." now that could be truly inspirational, motivating, and effective.

I should write a golf book.

WD for Butterboy

News flash! Gore just withdrew for the Buick. Tried to eat his putter and it didn't sit well with him ----

Is this part of a golf score or 2 phone numbers in Connecticut

3743463 3855334

Coming from Connecticut, I know a few amateurs who'd want a piece of Buttertits this weekend.

Apologies

We have a rain delay for the update for this week... the money list didn't refresh until late yesterday, and I don't see the point in putting up an update on a Wednesday... I'll get the next one up on Sunday, assuming they can actually finish on time.

Also, it completely slipped my mind to depost the last few trade checks... they've been in my office drawer for a while now... I'll do that this week. Sorry if I am fucking up you checking balance.

Update

Jeff had a small disaster in his home this weekend, involving a washing machine that not only filled the washing machine tub but also the entire first floor of his house... as such, he is out of pocket for a few days, and I am not going to bother with an update. We'll get er done for next week, assuming he is able to get back into his home.

And This Year's Winner...

... for the award of "Random Fat Fuck That Plays Well At The Open" is...

Kenneth Ferrie!
Take a bow, Tubs... assuming you can bend through the back. Your award will be presented by Jason Gore, as soon as he finishes off the all you can eat crab legs at the Red Lobster.

Streaming Video

In case you didn't know... ESPN.com is streaming video from the 6th and 10th holes at Winged Foot. So, those of us with real jobs can sneak a peak from time to time.

SHIT!!!

Damnit!!! I was out of town at the beginning of the week, and I totally forgot to do my side bet with Tiger Philp. We always draft players for each major. Damn! Tiger, if you read this by COB today (that's "Close Of Business") and want to do the draft, you can have the first pick... just do them under this post.

My being out of town also meant no update... I'll get one done after the Open.

Bigger and Stronger Players

It has been a sport in recent years where players have mashed the long ball with stunning, stupefying regularity.

It has been a sport where some of the top players in the game have become visibly bigger and stronger.

It has been a sport where, for far too long, there has been no drug-testing policy or even a written rule forbidding the use of performance-enhancing drugs.

No, silly, not baseball.

Golf... (FULL STORY)

Rocco's Demise???

It looks like da Rodent's trade for Rocco may be in jeopardy!!! That's right, after a fine 68 yesterday, he started today's round with a birdie. Alas, after double bogies on the next 2 holes he withdrew from the event! WOW, this tops the recent WD by Allenby. Perhaps his bad back was acting up. Or thoughts of the drop zone on #12 at Augusta reared up and slapped him senseless. Maybe he needs the help of a sports psychologist? What do ya say there Robbo?

Westchester Thoughts

Brett Quigley and Billy Andrade on the top of the leaderboard? What the hell is this, the Rhode Island Open? All we need now is Brad Faxon...

My boy Hunter Mahan is in a nice position... to shoot 77 tomorrow. Currently in 10th place, I expect him to have a stunning 38-39 tomorrow to fall back to the middle of the field.

Some Data

I was just goofing with the spreadsheet to make sure the formulas are correct... here is some fodder for discussion.

Excluding trades and short picks, the top 5 picks in the FPGP to date are:

1. David Duval (113 points)
2. Richard Johnson (98)
3. Stephen Ames (96)
4. "Tour Star" Danny Ellis (95)
5. Jesper Parnevik (74)

Conversely, the worst picks so far, excluding trades, shorts, and the guys who got dumped are:

1. D.J. Trahan (-57)
2. Padraig Harrington (-49)
3. Paul Casey (-45)
4. Jason "Staying Home During the Open" Gore (-35)
5. Sergio Garcia (-33)

The "average" score per player, excluding trades and shorts is 20.8

The median score is 20 (which is Jimmy Walker)

There is also a near perfect correlation with the order of the trades and how well they are doing... what I mean is that the first trade (Jeff's for Greg Owen) has been the best, and they get progressively worse the longer we waited to execute a trade... that may turn out differently by the end of the year though.

Tiger Philp and Trevor Immelman... Separated at Birth?

Maybe I think all people who are in need of a haircut and wear goofy white visors look the same... but there is a resemblance, no? (not in the gut area).

Post Memorial LEADERBOARD

RIP: Tommy Cuthbert

Charleston Post and Courier story on Tommy Cuthbert.

F PGA Golfers!

Ok, not all PGA golfers, but Allenby. Makes the cut and WD's. He best be hurt. I think the PGA should put in a penalty that if you WD for an event, regardless of the reason, you are not allowed to play the next Major, or next 3 events if the player doesn't qualify for a Major.

PGA Championship Curse

So, I was looking at the Memorial scores... and I saw that my Rich "Beem me up some bogeys" shot 83. 83!!! That is just embarrasing. Then I thinking "how the hell did this guy win a major?" and "what the fuck was I smoking when I made my picks" and then "I am kind of hungry..." but I digress.

I looked at the last 20 winners of the PGA Championship. Basically, if this is your only major, you have a shitty career after winning it. Look for yourself.

2005 — Phil Mickelson, Baltsurol, Springfield, New Jersey
2004 — Vijay Singh, Whistling Straits, Kohler, Wisconsin
2003 — Shaun Micheel, Oak Hill, Rochester, New York
2002 — Rich Beem, Hazeltine, Chaska, Minnesota
2001 — David Toms, Atlanta Athletic Club, Duluth, Georgia
2000 — Tiger Woods, Valhalla, Louisville, Kentucky
1999 — Tiger Woods, Medinah, Medinah, Illinois
1998 — Vijay Singh, Sahalee, Redmond, Washington
1997 — Davis Love III, Winged Foot, Mamaroneck, New York
1996 — Mark Brooks, Valhalla, Louisville, Kentucky
1995 — Steve Elkington, Riviera, Los Angeles, California
1994 — Nick Price, Southern Hills, Tulsa, Oklahoma
1993 — Paul Azinger, Inverness, Toledo, Ohio
1992 — Nick Price, Bellerive, St. Louis
1991 — John Daly, Crooked Stick, Carmel, Indiana
1990 — Wayne Grady, Shoal Creek, Birmingham, Alabama
1989 — Payne Stewart, Kemper Lakes, Hawthorn Woods, Illinois
1988 — Jeff Sluman, Oak Tree, Edmond, Oklahoma
1987 — Larry Nelson, PGA National, Palm Beach Gardens, Florida
1986 — Bob Tway, Inverness, Toledo, Ohio

You basically have a list of guys with impressive careers and winners of multiple majors (like Tiger, Phil, Vijay... hell, even Larry Nelson), and just flat out "after I won this I was a scrub"... Tway never did anything else. Sluman never did anything else. Wayne Grady was a top 3 player in the world in 1990, but never did anything after winning this. Azinger, Elkington, Brooks... it is amazing. DL3 is hard to categorize, but he never won a big tourney after winning his PGA either.

I guess the lesson is this... when making an FPGP pick, don't add much weight to the "former winner of a major, PGA Championship" because it means diddly squat.

TRADES

Ok everyone, the trading deadline has come and gone... here are the last 2 moves.

Da Bandit has dropped Alex Cejka and has picked up Chris Smith.
Robbo has dropped Vijay Singh and has picked up Rocco Mediate.

Johnny V. stands pat, which may be the most shocking move of all. I did this last year, unable to move my worst player while I was in 2nd place, and it ended up costing me as I slid to 4th on the last weekend of the year.

As an aside, Robbo admitted that he waited until the 11th hour because he was waiting for Johnny V.'s trade to post on the blog... a little "Junior Bandit" game I guess.

These trades will be reflected in the next update... now that we are stuck with our teams, Jeff and I may not be quite as diligent with the updates... I'll try to do it every week, but if we miss one, sorry.

I am already thinking of some improvements for next year's FPGP. What would you guys think of having multiple trades? If this is going to be some kind of "fantasy league" I think we should be able to make more than one move. And, the more trades, the more cash in the kitty... I don't envision unlimitted trades, as I don't want to deal with those headaches... but maybe allowing 2 or 3. I'd also like to extend the number of players we actually pick, which would also present a "I may need to make more trades" problem. Give me some input on this... I don't want to set it up so that it precludes folks from getting in the pool... rather, I'd like to see this pool double in participants next year... again, more money in the pot, and suddenly this becomes REALLY interesting. I'd love to see everyone recruit one more person for next year... show em the blog, show em the little fun we have... it is about the cheapest entertainment I get.